My Sister's Keeper

Erin and me, circa 1990.  As you can tell, I was typically
the more reserved one.

January 10, 1990 has always been one of my favorite days.  It was the day that my younger sister, Erin, was born.  I was an only child for eight years, so the thought of having a sibling thrilled me.  When she came around, everything was so much more fun.  I never felt jealousy towards her, and fighting would have been ridiculous since I was so much older.  In some ways I was like another parent to her.

Our family and those who knew us well described us as, "night and day."  Not only were we different in appearance, her with her lighter, porcelain-like skin, light brown hair and green eyes.  We were also uniquely individual in our personalities.  I always admired her spirit.  From the time she was a toddler, she had no problem making her requests known and not taking anything from anyone.  She didn't care who you were.

Sometimes when Erin smiles, her eyes disappear...isn't she cute?!

She had, and still has, an extra soft spot in her heart for me, though.  When I was in the 7th grade, I made a really bad decision and my parents were scolding me (trust me when I say I deserved it).  She immediately burst into tears and said, "Don't get mad at Sissy (her lifelong nickname for me)!"  We attended an awards ceremony when I was a junior in high school, and immediately after receiving my certificates, she ran up to me, grabbed my hand, and walked me back to my seat, smiling up at me and beaming the entire way.  Suffice it to say she has been one of my greatest fans.

About three months ago, Erin went to see the gynecologist regarding a lump in her pelvic area.  They decided to surgically remove the mass, sent it to a lab and found out that it was Squamos Cell Carcinoma (SCC).  The good news is that the surgery removed it all from the pelvic area and that part of the body does not need further treatment.  The bad news is that after months of tests and lab work, they found five precancerous cells (SCC) in her lungs.  Starting tomorrow morning (Wednesday), Erin will go through eight sessions of chemotherapy, followed by multiple sessions of immunotherapy, in hopes of killing off the cells.

We are optimistic, overall, about the diagnosis and that all will be well in the end.  Erin is now 26 years old and has shown great resolve and strength in the midst of this whole ordeal.  She has told me the dose of chemotherapy she will receive is a low one, and the doctor has said she won't have the usual side effects (hair loss, nausea, etc.).  Ultimately, we won't know how she will react until she has gone through a couple of sessions.

Though she is a full grown woman, I still see her as the little sister that followed me around everywhere when we were younger.  I will likely always see her that way.  This whole process has been a journey for me, too.  I have had moments of great faith, and other times that I have fallen apart at the thought of her suffering.  For a long time growing up, I felt responsible for her, almost to a fault.  It wasn't until I was a mature adult that I realized I was not.  The Lord is her keeper, and will do a much better job caring for her than I ever could.  He has gone before her and will be with her throughout this entire process and will see it to the end.

So I ask that you please keep her and the rest of our family in your prayers.  Pray that she is healed.  Pray that this makes us all better, and not bitter.

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.  Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you.  You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart." -Jeremiah 29:11-13

When Mamas Hibernate...

As we get closer to meeting our baby girl (I am 35 weeks along today), I have been reflecting on ways people have helped us in the past that have really blessed us.  I am part of what seems to be a pregnancy wave this time around, and I hope to shed some light on how we can help new mamas.  Because we will be welcoming our third child, we are well versed in what has served us well and what has not.  Read on if you are curious or would like to be part of a welcoming and transitioning community for a new or current mom in your life.

We eat anything and everything!  Favorites include pasta,
chicken dishes and seafood.

1.  Do offer to bring us meals.  

They can be homemade, take-out or store-bought.  Check to make sure that the family you're feeding doesn't have any food allergies.  And if they do, avoid using those ingredients.

We, personally, have no known food allergies.  This makes it very easy to feed us!  Acts of Service is my dominant love language, so my love tank is full when people help in this way (and so is my stomach—winning!).   My mother-in-love, Kathy, and one of my closest friends, Jenn, will be in charge of organizing this when the time comes. Getting in touch with them would be a great move if you are interested!

Don't expect an extended visit when you drop off food. Families will typically set up a general time for meal drop offs (ex:  between 5:30-6:30 pm) that is most convenient for them.  Sometimes I have said hello to those dropping off food and briefly introduced them to the baby, other times I have not.

Mothers may be nursing, catching up on sleep, bathing, keeping other children in line, etc.  Life becomes unpredictable for a season.  Do not take it personally if they aren't the hostess with the mostest when you come around.

2.  Do reach out to us.  

This may sound impersonal and calloused, but texting usually works best during this season of life, and will work even more so when the baby comes.  (Please reread #1 under Don't expect an extended visit... if confused.)

Exceptions to this include emergencies, needing to discuss specific situations and conflict resolution—all of which are done better in conversation, either over the phone or in person.  There is too much that can be misread and miscommunicated by text message.

Don't expect an immediate response.  We will get back to you as soon as we can.  If a couple of hours have passed and you still have not heard from us, it does not necessarily mean that we have not read or appreciated your message.  We simply have not gotten around to responding yet.

3.  Do offer to entertain older children (if you have a relationship with them).  

Newborns are completely helpless and dependent on their parents, especially mom.  If there are older siblings in the family, they will be in need of extra love and attention for the first couple of months while everyone transitions.

A couple of our favorite babysitters brought over ingredients
to make Rice Krispy treats for our children; they thought that
was awesome!

Don't expect to take them away on a day-long field trip (unless you are a close, trusted relative or family friend that has done this before).  Some of the best babysitters we have had showed up with surprises for the children or toys they could play with during their time together.  The children love them, and it gives them a break from playing with their usual toys.

4.  Do give us time to transition.  

Everything changes when a baby joins a family.  Everything.  If you start feeling like the relationship you had with a new mother is not the same, that's because it's not (especially if you do not have children of your own).  That does not mean that your friendship is no longer valuable or worth investing in, but it, too, will go through a transition.

Don't expect us to bounce back into all previous extra-curricular activities.  Perhaps this is only me, but I take my sweet time healing physically, mentally and emotionally after the birth of a child.  I am in no hurry to get back to normal life.  I admire those who quickly jump back into everything, but I am not one of them, nor do I desire to be.

Every mother is different, just like each child she raises will be.   Respect whatever boundaries she and her family establish, even if you do not agree with them.

5.  Do be ready to listen.  

Raising children:  it really does take a village!

Being a new mom or becoming a mother all over again can be overwhelming, frustrating and lonely.  Obviously, there are great blessings that come with having children or we wouldn't do it, especially more than once.  Knowing that you are an available ear will bring great comfort to her.

Don't be quick to give advice... unless she asks for it.  New parents, especially, have no idea what they're doing.  Those of us who have done it a couple more times still can have no idea.  None of us is perfect at it or gets it right every time.  Trying to correct her or give your two cents when she hasn't asked for them will only hurt her.

These pointers have worked well for us and close friends of mine and their families that I have observed.  Above all, celebrate and rejoice with the new mothers in your life!  It truly is a wonderful time.

What have been some helpful ways people have served you during these transitions, or what are some unique ways you have served others?  I would love to hear your ideas!

Music Genetics 2016 Summer Camp

We just wrapped up a fantastic week of Summer Music Camp here at Music Genetics Piano Studio, and I am eager to share some of our favorite activities!  This was our second year hosting a camp, and we had a delightful group of students to work with.  Special thanks goes out to Pastor John Phillips and Christ Church of the Valley, for graciously allowing us to use their lovely building and enjoy the gazebo and garden area outside, my mother, for being my teaching partner, and our two volunteers, Maria and Sally, for working hard.  We hope to see all of our participants again next year and encourage them to bring friends!  Please enjoy our week in review!

The mornings would begin with the teachers and volunteers arriving between
8:15-8:30 to set up for the first activity of the day.  Students usually showed up
 between 8:45-9:00.  Pinterest was a great help in writing the curriculum
 for camp this year!

Examples of some of the name tags students made (out of small records).

Our first icebreaker:  we played, "What Note Am I?"  Students had to walk
around and ask one another yes/no questions based on what musical note
they had on their forehead.

A big portion of our camp focused on music theory:  reinforcing how to read
 notes and recognize different musical symbols.

We split the students up into two groups, and they made team flags.  

This team was called, "The Treble Clef Cars."

The other group, "The Trouble (Treble) Clefs."

Taking a break from Dueling Dice, a musical game that reinforces 

mathematical concepts (note values and adding).

We spent at least 30 minutes outside each day (our camp ran from 9 am-12 pm).
  Here we are playing a water ballon note name game toss.  Students threw
water balloons at the drawn keyboards and had to name the notes they hit.
Children standing behind the keyboard enjoyed getting wet!

We played a water balloon toss with the leftover water balloons.

The students had fun with our note-name scavenger hunt.  Our volunteers
set up flashcards all around the building.  The children had to find them,
and label them with the correct name on their sheets.  They worked in pairs.

These partners were the only two to receive a perfect score on their 

Note Name Scavenger Hunt.  Everyone did well, but they were extra proud!

Mrs. Rosie taught an incredible lesson on painting a caricature of 

Johann Sebastian Bach!

The children did a wonderful job painting their own individual Bach caricatures.

Musical Twister was a favorite activity of the week!

In between certain sessions, we gave the students 5-10 minutes of free time to
get the wiggles out!  They all got along really well!

We enjoyed snack time under the lovely gazebo each day, and the children
enjoyed exploring the garden area around it.

Story time:  all about the life of Johann Sebastian Bach.

At the end of the week, one of our volunteers, Maria, led the students in
creating a homemade banjo.  She did a wonderful job!

"Let's rock, let's rock...TODAY!"

Reflection is always good.  Towards the end of the week, we had the students
write about and draw what their favorite parts of camp were.
They then shared with the whole group.

We ended camp with a swimming pool party!  Who doesn't love those?!

It is important to note that most of these activities were not original ideas.  Through Pinterest, I follow other piano teachers and musical schools that are generous with their homemade examples.  Links to some of my favorite sites are below:

Musical worksheets

Music Camp Ideas

A big thanks also goes out to our participants this year and their parents!  Thank you for your continued support of Music Genetics Piano Studio.  See you all next summer!